Mar 4 2012, 08:54 PM
A drunk staggers into a Catholic Church, enters a confessional booth and sits down but says nothing.
The Priest coughs a few times to get his attention but the drunk continues to sit there.
Finally, the Priest pounds three times on the wall.
The drunk mumbles, "Ain't no use knockin, there's no paper on this side either."
Mar 26 2012, 09:58 PM
Bearing in mind that I am a blasphemer - it's very funny!
Aug 23 2012, 08:31 PM
Three expatriates are drinking in a NY City bar.
"As good as this is," said the Scotsman, "I still prefer the pubs back home. In Glasgow, there's a wee place called McTavish's. The landlord goes out of his way for the locals. When you buy four drinks, he'll buy the fifth.
"Well, Angus," said the Englishman, "at my local pub in London, the Red Lion, the barman will buy you your third drink after you buy the first two."
"Ahhh, dat's nothin'," said the Irishman, "back home in my favorite pub, the moment you set foot in the place, they'll buy you a drink, then another, all the drinks you like, actually. Then, when you've had enough drinks, they'll take you upstairs and see dat you gets laid, all on the house!"
The Englishman and Scotsman were suspicious of the claims.
The Irishman swore every word was true.
"Did this actually happen to you?" they asked.
"No not meself, personally, no," admitted the Irishman,
"but it did happen to me sister quite a few times."
Feb 18 2013, 01:15 PM
Ha ha, thanks for sharing.
Feb 28 2013, 09:30 PM
here's another found online..
A Englishman, a Scotsman, and an Irishman walk into a pub. They each buy a pint of Guiness beer.
Just as they were about to enjoy their creamy beverage three flies landed in each of their pints, and were stuck in the thick head.
The Englishman pushed his beer away from him in disgust.
The Scotsman fished the offending fly out of his beer and continued drinking it as if nothing had happened.
The Irishman too, picked the fly out of his drink, held it out over the beer and then started yelling, "SPIT IT OUT, SPIT IT OUT, YOU *******!!"